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T&A: What dreams are made of. Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "cleveland_jr" journal:

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December 3rd, 2006
09:02 pm

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The Unicorn Code

1. Unicorns never lie.
2. Unicorns always lend a helping hand.
3. Unicorns are loyal.
4. Unicorns can keep a secret.
5. Unicorns don't use drugs.

Current Music: califone

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March 24th, 2006
12:31 pm

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One sunny afternoon, two kittens, a billy goat named Cortez, and a songbird were frolicking on a beautiful little hillock. For hours the quartet jumped and wrestled and sang and danced until they could stand no longer. They stretched out in the green, green grass and gazed up at the immense welkin. About this time, Cortez yelped a most terrible yelp.
"What's the matter?" his woodland friends inquired.
"It's my mouth," Cortez whimpered. "Something is wrong with my mouth."
The bird and the kittens gathered 'round old Cortez and decided that the problem was his wisdom teeth. "Do you know what a wisdom tooth is, Cortez?" one kitten purred.
"I can't say that I do. Is it magic?" Cortez asked innocently.
"No, silly! Wisdom teeth are third molars that usually appear in billy goats about your age. They often grow in the mouth athwart, and surgery is usually necessary."
"SURGERY!?!?" Cortez yelped. "SCALPELS? FORCEPS?? SYRINGES??? I CAN'T! I WON'T MAKE IT!!!" Cortez raced away from his friends towards a small orchard nearby. He hunkered behind an old stump and started to cry.
"We should go talk to him," the songbird said. The woodland friends scoured the orchard for what seemed like an hour.
"We've looked everywhere," a kitten uttered, exhausted from all the searching.
"Wait a minute...the songbird said. "The stump! We haven't looked behind the old stump!"
They raced to the stump, and surely enough, there was Cortez, asleep in a pool of his own tears. "Look at his mouth," said a kitten, "I've never seen a frown that big before! We have a real problem on our hands, guys."
"I have an idea!" the songbird spouted, "Let's do the surgery right now! While he's asleep! He won't feel a thing!"
"What a great idea! He'll be so happy when he wakes up! Let's do it!" said a kitten.
So the three got started on the surgery, using homemade utensils from items in the forest. The three were hard at work, determined to finish the surgery before Cortez woke up.
"He's gonna be so happy!" the songbird said with a huge songbird grin.
Well, as it turns out, two kittens and a songbird are not the best oral surgeons. Actually, what the animals considered "surgery" was really just shoving pinecone after pinecone into Cortez's little billy goat mouth. Cortez died in his sleep from asphyxiation. To this very day, the bird and the two kittens are waiting by Cortez's side, waiting for Cortez to wake up, so they can yell, "SURPRISE!"

The End

Current Mood: storytelling-y
Current Music: built to spill - velvet waltz

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December 3rd, 2005
12:59 pm

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BWP
Blackwater Phenomenon is playing at the moonlight cafe in vestavia at 5:15 today (Saturday)

You should come.


We'll play Boonon


i took the SAT IIs this morning. sucked

Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: hmmm....i dunno...maybe EYES TO SEE?!?!?

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October 30th, 2005
10:43 pm

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i just want to go ahead and clarify that for halloween, i am a ghost. i know what you're all thinking, "look at that white guy with a sheet on his head, he must be a klansman, lets get him." but i assure you, i am just a ghost, not a kkk member. i love black people. they're like brothers to me

Current Mood: draineddrained
Current Music: faithless street - whiskeytown

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September 24th, 2005
01:28 pm

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ANNOUNCEMENT:
Vestapalooza is this Tuesday
Blackwater Phenomenon, the band in which i play guitar and sing, is playing at Vestavia Hills High School at 8:20.
You should come.
If you dont like me, Nick Cox, Patrick Mulligan, and James Casey are in the band too, maybe you like them.



Also, my birthday is tomorrow. I expect well-wishes from everyone. gorebels

Current Music: smp

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September 20th, 2005
07:48 pm

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i just took a quiz on the internet, and apparently im a socialist. it gave me a link that i could easily copy and paste onto livejournal, so that everyone could see the exact results for themselves, but i think its a bit arrogant to assume that anyone at all cares about my internet quiz results. go rebels!

Current Music: daydream nation

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September 19th, 2005
10:50 pm

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tomorrow they may wrap fishes in it
but i was a star for one whole minute

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August 31st, 2005
03:42 pm

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i was playing warball at school and then i broke my wrist and passed out

i think a gerbil or something got stuck in my ice machine cuz it has been making all of these terrible grinding/squeaking noises for a good 20 minutes. also, the ice is all covered in blood and gerbil bits

Current Music: turd on the run

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August 16th, 2005
09:59 pm

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I started this orgainzation that collected stool samples from people in order to research nutrition in people today compared to that of yesteryear, but it all fell through because nobody gave a shit.

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August 15th, 2005
04:04 pm

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i just ate something called strawberry-banana peaches. strawberry-banana being an adjective modifying the noun, peaches. strawberry-banana peaches. strawberry. banana. peaches. i just dont know anymore...

Current Music: im in the mood for some eggplant-corn turnips

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